I can't recall, but there was a day that we argued and I text him to say that I want separation. I guess through out time, I learned that just say what I want. I can no longer hold it. I'm not scared and I don't give a shit.
I don't know why, he said he wanted to make a confession, something that he's been hiding from me. And that he has been seeing his old girlfriend. I think she's about his age.. 40 plus, doing well but not married. And that he wanted to marry her coz she's nice and all.
And to my surprise, it didn't ticked me at all. I just thought, hell yeah! that's my key to freedom. I used to tell him that since I'm never a good wife, mother or even as a women, I ask him to find one that can take care of him the way he wants. And when he told me that, I was calm and told him that he can marry her, with condition that he needs to let me go. He argued that she will not be a burden as she is independent, has her own house, car and financially stable. Well, I insisted that that's the deal. I even asked him to make plan on how things should be. Kids arrangement and all. After awhile he told me that, he don't think he can marry her, as she's about his age and probably could not take care of him if he gets sick. Arghh..typical selfish person he is. And the best part is, he told me he didn't think he can find anyone who can serve him they way I did for sex. Arghh again!! What a fucker! I guess the way out is probably to not be good in bed!! Mengangkang je keje..sapa tak nak! Wtf!!
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