my lil pincet

She's 4 but she speaks her mind macam budak besar. She's 4 but she has seen a lot of my life. Masyallah! Tapi bab nangis high pitch tu memang tak leh lawan la..leh cair gegendang telinga. Only me as her mother leh tahan la kan. The daddy terus naik BP okeh! Standard la owang laki! Nampak perkasa tapi tak ramai yg kebal dengan screaming and crying pitch of babies or kids! That's the fact la kann...

She's a girl who always wants to look pretty like her mom. Choose her own clothes to wear, brush her teeth twice a day, asking me when her gigi rongak nak cantik, asking me to do tocang, wear headbands, likes to eat kismis and kurma coz I told her that can make her smart girl. Suka sangat main online game dress up girls and cooking. And because I sent her to Islamic kindergarden, she likes to sing Islamic songs, Arabic songs in which I know most of them and sing along. Tapi bila menari macam Kpop girls la plak! Haih!! "Mami jangan pakai sexy tau! Nanti masuk neraka! Mami dah maghrib..solat! Ahh..okay sayang! Selamba je dia sound wa. Hehe. She's my lil girl. Hope she stays that way.

So last night, I had a sweet conversation with her while putting her to bed.

She said..Mommy nanti adik dah besar kann..adik nak ingat balik..macam mana mami jaga adik..pegang tektek mami masa tido..hantar adik pegi skola..beli nasi lemak..bawak adik pegi jalan..pegi Tesco, Giant..Pastu pergi London, Paris..tapi masa tu kan..adik tak ingat la macam mana Paris London tu.

Adik kan kecik lagi..nanti adik besar adik pergi la travel. Tapi..nanti adik dah besar..mami dah tua dah..adik dah tanak kawan mami dah..adik ada kawan gegirls adik sendiri..

Huwaaa...terus dia nangis and hug me. Adik tanak mami tua..adik nak kawan mami..adik sayang mami..huwaaa..huwaaa... wa pon nangis daaa...so touching moment!

I hope she remember what she said when she grew up. I pray that her life will be protected from bad things always and she will grow up to be beautiful and smart girl. Tak sempat plak nak record confession dia..kalu dia notty besar nanti..siap ko! Hahaha

Slowly I'm teaching her to be my lil girl. Teaching her things I was never thought during my young times and those self taught lessons. She needs to be smart so she can make wise decision in her life. I even ask her to speak to the kurma that she's about to eat, so that the kurma will also help her to make her smart and healthy. Hah! Macam takde kena mengena! Hehehe.

Nanti bila dia dah remaja, wa nak ajar dia caner nak jadi superwoman. Haha. To head her up with all life challenges, caner nak membaca gerak geri lelaki, tipu helah derang bagai. Sebab these boys they start young due to biological needs..cuma bila dah besar..trick je hupgrade sket..walaupun concept nye masih sama. So wa kena equip my lil girl. She can't have the perception that boy/man will protect her from harm! (except her brother) Bullshit sumer tu girl! So she need to take care of herself well, to be independant and not to depend on others.

And having said that, I will assure that my son respct woman - to be a man that lead and protect his family. Jangan menggunakan kehenseman dan kepandaian untuk mempermainkan hati perempuan. Challenge is for boy/man ni sumer thrill and excitement. Kalo dia akil baligh nanti and stim how??? Caner wa nak handle? I don't have penis so can't really put myself into his shoes la kan. Tapi sebab wa banyak la gak penis experience or how it can make man go nuts, hopefully wa can guide him. Nanti wa research lah dengan lebey mendalam.For girls takde perasaan ni sumer, so area ni agak selamat.

With him, it's getting better now. Permintaan lucah melampau tu, memang wa buat bodo je sekarang. Cuma bila keadaan terdesak sahaja wa ikutkan la permintaannya. Atas dasar kasih atau kasihan tu...at that point of time, I'm not really sure, tapi dalam hati..wa LililahiTaala je lah! Sesungguhnya Allah juga maha mengetahui apa yang wa sendiri tatau. Like I always pray, if this marriage is the best for me, I wish for Allah to bless this relationship and if it's not, to make separation as smooth as possible. Wa pasrah dan redha je la dengan ujian ini. Kesabaran ni masih ada, so I'm using it prudently la kot.

Salam Jumaat semua. Makan pisang banyak-banyak! It's a happy fruit :)